A Quick Word About Videographers

Please, Please, Please do not hire some cheesy heartshaped cutaway video maker. I just had to put that out there... there are a lot of "videographers" who peddle their pathetic and hideous videos at Bridal Expos now and I want you to stay strong! Just because you own a camcorder, it doesn't make you a videographer. I know a lot of people kind of think of videographers last, and if the video isn't especially important to you then fine, but for those of you who want that as a keepsake and want it to be something beautiful, take a look at these wedding video (shorts) that Shade Tree Films does. They are so beautiful and make me wish I had done something like this for my wedding.

More and more people are making wedding videos like this- which is such a refreshing change from what was previously offered out there. Do some shopping around, look at their galleries of videos and make it what you want it to be. Because everyone knows weddings are where you can make some serious money- do your homework so you don't get swindled by some hack with a flip camera and only iMovie to edit it.

Let's Talk About DJs

I can't express enough just how important the DJ is. Your DJ is so much more than just the guy switching the songs on the ipod- he (or she) is the Master of Ceremonies. They will guide you and your guests through the reception from the dinner, the speeches, the dances, cake cutting and bouquet toss to your send off. And when you select the right one, they will make your reception seamless- free of awkward pauses and breaks in the night or uncomfortable fumblings of words when Uncle Joe tries to MC for you but doesn't actually know what's coming next and has to put his hand over the mic while he leans over to ask you what he's supposed to say- thus effectively making your night that much more stressful.

No. 

You need a professional- who you've met with a few times before the wedding that knows exactly what the schedule for the night is so you don't have to worry about a thing. I don't care how funny your brother is or how good at public speaking your friend is... hire a professional.

I've been to many a wedding where they did not have a DJ (or just had a crappy one) and the whole night was a mess... no one knows what's going on or where to go... it's always an absolute train wreck.

Having a real DJ- a good DJ- will save you from a stressful day of, and your guests from awkwardness, frustration, and having their ears blown out by the sound system that the person you have handling it didn't check and get ready before everyone got in there (this just happened last weekend)- I might still be a little sore about it.

You want your reception to flow like a river... and you don't want to have any doubts about how things are going to run. You need to feel confident that your DJ will provide you with a carefree night- so that you can truly enjoy your reception.

Now, when shopping for your DJ absolutely check references and online reviews, see if they have videos of their work and meet with final candidates to see who you best mesh with. Once you've selected your DJ, you need to meet with them at least twice. Believe me- this will put you much at ease. They've been doing weddings (hopefully) for years and know all the different ways you can schedule the events, what works, what doesn't, and they won't leave anything out. Our DJ made a timeline for us that we switched around a few times before settling on what we liked best... it made my wedding planning so much easier.

Then comes the conversation that, I believe, everyone should have with their DJ: The "No Cheese" conversation... Your DJ should not be the center of attention, they should not be the entertainment (aside from the music they play), they should not be chatty cathys- babbling on the mic all night about stupid unnecessary crap. This is not stand up comedy time. Your DJ is a guide- merely there to get you and your guests from one event to the next and to inform when necessary.

Think of them as the voice in the sky.... maybe that only makes sense to me. In any case, they are the stage director, the lighting engineer, the music cuer, and YOU are the leading lady and leading man. Your guests came to see you, not the sequined DJ.

Music!! Hand pick your primary songs for each of the key events, i.e. garter and bouquet tosses, cake cutting, first dance, father daughter, mother son, last dance, send off... etc... Don't let your DJ talk you into "what a lot of couples are choosing.." Pick songs that reflect you and the mood you want for your wedding and each of those events. For example, what we did at our wedding was:

First Dance: Lucky by Jason Mraz
Father/Daughter: Cinderella by Steven Curtis Chapman
Cake Cutting: Can't Help Falling in Love by Ingrid Michaelson
Bouquet Toss: Party in the USA by Miley Cyrus

Can I just say how tired I am of "Single Ladies" for the bouquet toss???? Ugh, let's get creative here people!

Also, keep in mind that you can have a "no play" list for your DJ... basically a list of songs that you forbid him to play. Some examples, Funky Chicken, Macarena, YMCA, We Are Family, Electric Slide, Mambo No. 5, etc.... You know the songs you hate- and honestly, if you chose a good DJ, he already knows not to play those unless the bride and groom ask for them.

Here is a good "at a glance" article on how to spot a bad dj check it out for more tips!

Just remember: Your wedding is about you. Not your DJ or his opinion on "how sweet they look" or his commentary or his jokes. YOU are what your guests came to see. He should keep it simple, play music you want, only speak when necessary, and fade into the background.

One last thing- your DJ should invite your guests to do whatever it is they're supposed to do rather than tell or demand (i.e. "I'd like to invite you to take your seats... I'd like to invite all the ladies onto the dance floor for the bouquet toss... We'd like to invite you to watch as the bride and groom cut the cake...") It creates a more pleasant atmosphere.

I hope this was helpful! There ARE great DJs out there- you just gotta take the time to find 'em!

The Devil is in The Details

Here is a closer look at the details from my wedding. Photography by Rachelle

The Alter

The Aisle Markers

The Programs with Fan Favors attached (if you know anything about Sacramento, you know it gets HOT in the summer... which is why our favors were fans). I designed the Programs myself and had them printed at a local print shop.... we used a decorative corner hole punch to attach the fan with ribbon.

The Ring Bearer's Pillow

What I Wore

Bride/Groom First Look



The Bouquets

The Bridesmaid Dresses

The Cake

The Cake Toppers and Toss Bouquet (Jordan plays soccer- hence the soccer topper... also, the bride came as a blonde with a pink ribbon and since I'm brunette and pink was not in my color scheme, my talented mother painted her for me :) )

The Centerpieces- we alternatedd tall and short pieces, the tables were all named by famous couples.

The Head Table

The Seating Key (note my awesome dance moves)

The Tent Lighting

The Party

Wedded Bliss

Make Up by LeiLani

Hair By Renee

DJ & Lighting by Sonny at Exquisite Entertainment

Wedding Coordination by Debra at Tres Fabu

Photography by Rachelle Photography

Flowers by Bartlett Flowers

Cake by Freeport Bakery

Bridesmaid Dresses by Dessy Group

Favors found on The Knot

First Thing's First

Just know, I come from a family with 50 people on just ONE side... and I'm the youngest, so all my cousins' weddings... I was there- watching, learning, judging. Now on my father's side I'm the (2nd) oldest- the first to get married. I like to think I set the bar pretty high for my still unmarried cousins ;-)

Aside from family I've been to a lot of weddings for friends and friends of family... I've seen the best and I've seen the worst.

My goal is to provide you with the advice you need to have a stellar wedding on any budget. Because I honestly and fervently believe you can have a beautiful wedding even if your budget is minuscule.

Let me tell you about my wedding. Jordan and I met in the first week of our senior year of college through a mutual friend, we ended up being in a class together that required us to work in groups throughout the entire class. So through that group we started spending time together and one night we went out after class and the rest is history. He proposed 3 months later, and we were married 9 months after that in Sacramento, CA.

We got married on September 6, 2009
5 o'clock in the evening
Le Rivage Hotel
River's Edge
(which means we had our ceremony and reception outdoors at their river-side location)

We then moved our guests up to the lobby where we had a cocktail hour set up with both displayed and passed hors d'ouvres and a "signature cocktail" that was really just Champagne with Chamborde in it.

We hired a pianist/singer to play and entertain guests while My Husband and I snuck off to take a few offsite pictures with our photographer.

It was important to us to have this cocktail hour for our guests because it tends to break the wedding mood when there's a long, empty delay between the ceremony and the reception. Guests get bored, hungry, and ultimately a little annoyed waiting for the wedding party to take all their millions of pictures before they can eat! And we all know people come huuungryyy to weddings in the hopes that it supplies good food and drinks!

Don't even ask me about the mural on the side of the tent-
apparently the restaurant patrons complained that the tent
blocked their view of the river and harbour. So they painted
the view on the tent.



Our reception was tented- back down by the ceremony site on the river. We had assigned seating and salads ready. Each table was equipped with 2 bottles of wine. After the wedding party's grand entrance/introduction, I welcomed everyone, and Jordan prayed over the meal. Now I don't think that every couple needs to do that, but I felt that because I am such an outspoken, extroverted person, I felt it would be strange and unlike myself to not say anything at my own wedding.

The dinner: salad, bread, Skirt Steak, accompanied by potatoes and some sort of veggie. I wanted to make sure the food was bomb because a lot of people were driving a long way to be at our wedding- I didn't want to disappoint them with some flavorless, dry, cheap chicken. And Everyone has told me it was the best food they've ever had at a wedding- some said the best they've ever had period. And I'd have to agree. Scott's Seafood, the restaurant at the hotel that provides the catering, had some delicious options to choose from! Also, it was plated... no buffet : )

While everyone was finishing their dinner, we had the speeches- all on a 1 minute time limit. From the fathers, the maid of honour and best man, and because they were our siblings, we each had our best friend do a speech as well. Kind of a lot looking back on it now, but oh well. We then went into the First Dance, followed by The Father-Daughter and Mother-Son dances. We shortened long songs so not to bore our guest with repetitive and limited dance moves. We did the cake cutting, but it wasn't any big deal where everyone watched or anything... and then it was party time. We made it a priority to keep all the traditions short and sweet because no one really cares, nor do they want to sit through an hour of all that crap.

After that we made our priority PARTY! We made sure that when it was dancin' time it was dancin' time. No more interruptions for boring stuff... just fun. The only thing we did during this time was the bouquet and garter toss and also a honeymoon dance. The bouquet toss was different as well- we chose not to go with the cliche "single ladies" instead all women were invited to join and the one who catches the bouquet received Good Luck as opposed to matrimonial promises. The same went for the men in the garter toss.

If you're confused by the term "Honeymoon Dance" you may know it as the "Money Dance"... now, I always felt that this was such a gauche tradition and was determined not to have it at my wedding, but when my husband asked for it repeatedly and our DJ recommended calling it a honeymoon dance instead, I caved. It was embarassing and awkward but boy am I glad we did it! It paid for all of our honeymoon excursions, shopping, and even a fancy, obscenely expensive lunch at the One & Only Ocean Club.

There was more dancing... and even more dancing to the amazing music hubby picked out and our first class DJ put together, and then it was time to head out!

So that's my wedding... it was wonderful and beautiful and fun. I've gotten so many remarks about what an amazing wedding we had and it always makes me feel so good! I wanted to be sure my guests had the best time!

I'll post again soon with the details and photos of our wedding for more in depth info!